Monday, December 16, 2013

Vanilla Twilight

The stars lean down to kiss you
And I lie awake and miss you
Pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere

'Cause I'll doze off safe and soundly
But I'll miss your arms around me
I'd send a postcard to you, dear
'Cause I wish you were here

I'll watch the night turn light-blue
But it's not the same without you 
Because it takes two to whisper quietly

The silence isn't so bad 
'Till I look at my hands and feel sad 
'Cause the spaces between my fingers
Are right where yours fit perfectly

And I'll find repose in new ways 
Though I haven't slept in two days 
'Cause cold nostalgia 
Chills me to the bone

But drenched in Vanilla Twilight 
I'll sit on the front porch all night 
Waist-deep in thought because 
When I think of you I don't feel so alone

I don't feel so alone 
I don't feel so alone

As many times as I blink 
I'll think of you tonight 
I'll think of you tonight

When violet eyes get brighter 
And heavy wings grow lighter 
I'll taste the sky and feel alive again

And I'll forget the world that I knew 
But I swear I won't forget you 
Oh, if my voice could reach back through the past 
I'd whisper in your ear 
Oh darling, I wish you were here

Oh this song goes so deep into my heart :'( 

Vanilla Twilight by Owl City | Lyrics source | Watch in Youtube

Sunday, December 15, 2013

Not Feeling Gud

Feeling so so bad from the past 1 week.
Wanna cry a lot.
That's all.

Thursday, December 12, 2013

Self-Healing

Every time I feel sad, depressed, mad, and so negative, most of the time I deal and cope it by myself. I don't have much friends whom I can talk everything-at every time with, so I just take a deep breath and heal my mood alone. And it's never easy. Thank God for the internet. I find so many inspirations that make me become more positive and cheerful in life. One of the inspirations comes from itsjudyslife, a beautiful family which posts their daily activities video on youtube (if some time ago I liked to watch make up video, nowadays I really like baby and family-thingy). I really love to see how they live beautifully and consistently make daily record of it. My mood has always turned good after watching them. May God bless Judy, Benji, Julianna, and the-coming soon-twins always. Do watch 1 video of their daily life. I am sure you'll want to know more.

pict from itsjudytime instagram

Saturday, December 7, 2013

That Man and The Motorbike

I often think about going to places far away, trying new things, and doing adventurous kind of activities that--I thought--will make me happy. I often perceived that I am a traveler-girl. How I want to see myself in near future: already visiting places that I dream of, like eastern part of Indonesia, India (again!), and Japan.

But in the past few weeks--I really have no idea how this happen--my vision has completely changed. How I want to see my life in near future: going out from my workplace, walking toward a man (which I call husband) who has waited for me on his motorbike--picking me up from work then we ride home together. Just that's simple. No need to go any further than my workplace and I can already feel how happy it would be.

It only takes that man, who can diminish all my adventurous thought and instantly turn it into a world that is more peaceful than I ever imagine.

If God offered me which one to choose, I would definitely choose the second one; with that man and the motorbike of course.


Ameen, Ya Robbal'alamin...

Wednesday, December 4, 2013

One Paragraph

I have been planning to write a story from some few months and I admit that it is not an easy thing at all. It really takes your persistence and tight commitment in every step of it. Btw, I just found some notes that I wrote few months ago. I hope this one short paragraph can be a part of the story. 

"I still remember that moment when first time I saw you in the middle of the night crowd. I scanned all faces of people around but I couldn’t find you. One millisecond after, you stepped to the front row with arms widely opened. Knowing that those arms were opened for me, I lost my words then falling into your arms. I cried. I cried like a kid. I cried with the feeling of a lost kid that suddenly found his mom. I cried in your arms."

Monday, December 2, 2013

Life of Me

I just watched Life of Pi today and I cried a lot :'(  :'(
*how can his life could be so tough like that and still survive...*

Pi has given me a reflection to my own life. No matter how hard the circumstances are, don't give up easily and don't be bad to everyone and everything around. Planet earth is very big, wild yet very beautiful. Don't be trapped inside your own life's bubble. Always have trust and positive thought to God's plan.

Sunday, December 1, 2013

Sunday's Resume

I was woken up by sudden heavy downpour at 3 AM this morning, then I continued my sleep and I got scary nightmare. It was like a chasing scene in a thriller movie and I was escaping myself from some people that wanna caught me. I was running, hiding myself, fighting, and swimming the river to get away from bandits that were trying to get precious things from me: my wedges and bicycle! What a strange scene. I got a bit breathless and scared feeling when I finally woke up at 5 AM :( *whew...

Still in the morning. After praying, I went jogging and accompanied my friend which took an exam for entering post-graduate study in UI. Wishing her for a good luck! :)

And by the afternoon, I got random ideas of having a hotel business. That time I was watching a news that talked about a hotel in Netherlands that has only 1 room but they take really good care of it and treat the guest to feel really like at home. Just a small room with 1 master bed, bathroom, small fridge, TV, aircon, and resto, but they are already full booked for a year! Wow! It's not them to get the customers, but customers that make queue for them! O la la!!!

Hmm... Yaa, the idea of business is already in mind. Please God, lead me and show me the way. Ameen.

You know, from many time I always perceived myself as someone who is never good in business. And if only I have to choose what kind of business I wanna to jump into, I might not opt for food and fashion business. I am still not 100% sure why, but it's not because I hate them. I love them, a lot! I love food and I like fashion, but I would give my hands up to turn things I love into business.

Ya, ya, ya. Let see. My planning so far is: if I didn't get accepted in government job, I would take teaching (or anything I love) as profession. Then I am gonna save my money and invest them in business, a nice and good one of course :)
Dear God, please give me strength to be persistent to make it true and please keep me away from laziness and keep me in healthy always. Ameen.

Oh ya, one more thing. I am seriously thinking of having a dog!



Good night!