FAN

I started watching Bollywood movies eversince I came back from India (Bollywood used to be something I really HATED and never paid any attention to! lol). Most of the time, I would roll my eyes seeing my elementary friends (at the early 2000's) talking about Kuch Kuch Hota Hai, Rahul, Anjeli, Kajol, etc, etc.

I think universe has cursed me for hating something way too bad. (Moral: Don't ever hate something too bad if you don't have knowledge about it.)

And now, Bollywood movies now have been my best remedy everytime I feel low. And the best part is... Shah Rukh Khan.

Do not ask me why, I hardly know the reason how can I like him as an actor.. I mean, an exceptional actor. Just watch his movies then you can tell yourself.

So, cannot stop watching FAN teaser today... OMG... Even a teaser of his upcoming movie made me cry already... Can't wait for the FAN movie to release.

Aand, last but not least, HAPPY 50th BIRTHDAY SHAH RUKH KHAN!!!! (OMG can't believe he is the same age as my mom!)

Thank you so much for the inspiration, motivation, laugh, and tears you have brought into my life after watching your movies. 

Have many wonderful years ahead. May Allah bless and protect you always.

Awesome JAPANESE!!!!

Randomly watched these videos basically about kids and food in Japan and I am instantly running out of words!!

WTF freaking awesome JAPANESE!!!!!!!

Near Death Experience

So around 2 am in the morning I woke up from my sleep feeling terribly painful in my back, shoulder and lower throat. It felt like someone/something had crashed my back so hard and something had blocked the airflow inside my throat so that I couldn't breath properly. Semi-consciously I moved my body left-right while rubbing my back and shoulder but the more I rubbed the more I realized that this is not fine. I difficultly breathed in and out feeling the pressure and pain in my lower throat. Something is going wrong. OMG... Am I dying?

I then walked outside my bedroom, crying to Mom who's already in the kitchen. She gave me a glass of water and made a cup of warm tea while my brother's also awaken and rubbed my back and shoulder with Counterpain. I drank the water, and then sucked the warm tea, and stretched my arms, shoulder, chest, opened them up, made a yoga kind of warming up, and breathed slowly trough my mouth. Inhale and exhale. Subsequently, I had a lot of burping out loud and my throat felt slightly better. No more painful pressure there. 

I couldn't back to sleep afterwards coz I felt like my heart beat so fast, the beat I usually have when I feel nervous to deliver a presentation in front of a big audience. I decided to open my laptop and do browsing until 6 am, then slept for 30 minutes, and went for breakfast consists of rice, animal protein, and vegetable. While eating I reckoned what I have done the days before.....

Two days ago, (Saturday, 22-8-2015)
Was my first day in college. It was a full-day class from 8 am- 5pm. Coming back home I was so tired and my body temp. was little high. I thought I was going to get fever on the next day.

Yesterday, (Sunday, 23-8-2015)
The second day in college. Also a full-day class from 8 am - 5 pm. I had lontong gulai for breakfast which I myself considered as un-nutritious meal. For lunch I only munched on bakwan and bubur kacang hijau which is full of santan (which I threw away that santan and sucked the moong bean only). As for dinner, I had no options but cooked instant noodle coz there was literally nothing to eat at home. No cooked rice, nothing to eat with rice if there's any, and Mom didn't cook somemore coz she had to attend an event outside. So, there the noodle went into my tummy that night. Felt so unpleasantly full. Ugh!

Then I went sleep.... I guess in the wrong position coz the head pillow went a little way down the head so the shoulder and chest position were higher than the head. 

somewhat in position like this but with the underpinning right under my shoulder

Mom told me it could be called as angin buruk, or something I've ever heard as angin duduk, additionally she said that it could possibly lead to death. As for me, on the most negative degree of my self-diagnose, I would call it as a tiny heart attack caused by bad air circulation in my body which effects my heartbeat. OMG... True that my lecturer once said that if you want to have a long live, keep your cardio system a.k.a heart healthy and away from the silent killer called heart attack. 

OMG... Sounds so scary right? wtf.. One this morning angin buruk or whatever its called is more than enough for me. No more. I still have to finish writing my love story saga, develop it into a book or a movie perhaps (gotta be an Indo-Bollywood blockbuster I guess?!) and of course still many things to achieve and experience lah, like travel the world, performing Haji to Makkah, being rich, get married and #ahem. Hahaha!! Am I insane or what?

Gotta go for a healthier lifestyle and happier heart now.

Eat well, exercise well, move my body well, stay away from asshole smoker and its fucking smoke, sleep well, enjoy my life, and do not let any stress consume my mind.

OK.

Thank you for reading.

The Toners (Viva Face Tonic)

Hai semua!

Sebagai pemanasan sebelum melanjutkan The Visit Story saga (#eaa #regangkanjari #siapintisu), kali ini aku mau mereview produk toner yang aku pakai untuk membersihkan dan menyegarkan wajah sehari-hari. So, langsung aja ini dia... (semuanya produk buatan dalam negeri lho.. #bangga #cintaprodukIndonesia)

1. Viva Air Mawar
Viva Air Mawar ini bukan termasuk varian toner yaa karena kegunaannya adalah sebagai cairan pelarut lulur atau masker bubuk. Nah, aku sendiri pakai Viva Air Mawar ini untuk melarutkan bubuk peeling buat exfoliate bagian hidung dan t-zone wajah seenggaknya satu minggu sekali (maklum sarangnya whiteheads). Selain buat campuran peeling, sesekali aku pakai air mawar ini untuk menggantikan toner yang udah habis. Aromanya ringan (hampir nggak ke-detect aroma mawarnya) dan setelah diaplikasikan nggak bikin wajah jadi kering. Pernah juga sekali aku tambahin beberapa tetes air mawar ini ke facial-water spray yang aku simpan di kulkas, bau mawarnya jadi berasa banget.

2. Viva Face Tonic Bengkoang
Ini adalah toner harian aku. Pertama kali kenal dan beli toner pembersih muka, ya varian Bengkoang ini. Tau kenapa...? Apalagi kalau bukan karena ada klaim pencerahnya, hehe (tapi sampai sekarang kok kayaknya gitu-gitu aja nih warna kulit?) Aromanya ringan dan sehabis dipakai bikin wajah terasa bersih dan nggak bikin kering.

3. Viva Face Tonic Lemon
Beli ini sekitar 2-3 bulan yang lalu, disaat toner Bengkoang masih ada, karena... lagi jerawatan! Gerah dengan jerawat yang hilang satu tumbuh sekelurahan (bukan cuma face acne, tapi back-acne dan chest-acne juga, hikksss), aku hunting apa aja produk yang mengklaim bisa mengatasi jerawat, salah satunya toner ini. Meski diformulasikan untuk kulit berminyak, toner ini nggak menimbulkan efek dry out di kulitku yang tipe kering-kombinasi. Sehabis mandi dan cuci muka, aku suka aplikasikan toner ini dengan kapas buat membersihkan residu sabun di kulit. Soal jerawatnya... memang sih jerawat nggak langsung lenyap dan mengering dalam satu malam setelah pakai toner ini. Karena aku juga pake produk anti-acne lain, aku rasa toner ini cukup ngebantu lah kinerja produk-produk tersebut buat membersihkan bakteri-bakteri penyubur jerawat di permukaan kulit.

4. Viva Face Tonic Green Tea
Baru 3-4 hari yang lalu ngeliat toner varian green tea ini di department store, langsung deh aku sambar. Selain ekstrak green tea, toner ini juga mengandung tea tree oil yang membantu melawan bakteri penyebab jerawat dan allantoin yang menyejukkan dan melembutkan kulit (ngintip deskripsi dari balik botolnya, hehe). Aromanya, menurutku, kayak wangi syrup obat batuk anak. Baru aku pakai 3-4 kali dan so far so nice. Bikin kulit berasa segar dan nggak bikin kering. Semoga dengan pemakaian rutin bisa efektif buat ngebantu mengatasi jerawat, ya.

5. Viva Face Toner Spirulina
Sebenarnya, toner harian aku tuh yang varian Spirulina ini. Setelah sekian lama dan bosen pake toner Bengkoang, langsung deh aku comot toner Spirulina ini pas pertama kali liat di toko daann aku langsung sukaaa. Eh bentar, apa sih Spirulina itu? Mengutip dari balik kemasan botol, Spirulina itu adalah ganggang biru laut dengan kandungan protein, mineral, dan asam amino terlengkap sebagai nutrisi kulit. Jadi, selain buat membersihkan sisa-sisa kotoran dan susu pembersih di kulit, toner ini juga memberi makan kulit dengan kandungan protein dan mineral-nya. So far cocok bangeet di aku dan nggak bikin kulit kering juga. Masalahnya sih, kadang toner ini suka nggak ada di toko-nya alias out of stock. Botol ini juga baru aku beli minggu lalu. Sebelumnya pas botol terakhir habis, karena stoknya kosong terus, aku jadi balikan sama toner Bengkoang #ciyee.

Toner udah, sekarang ke susu pembersih atau milk cleanser.

Untuk milk cleanser aku pakai Viva Milk Cleanser Spirulina. Dari SMA udah pakai milk cleanser Viva yang varian Bengkoang, pas varian Sprulina keluar aku ganti ke Spirulina. Yang aku suka dari milk cleanser Viva ini teksturnya ringan, melembabkan, dan nggak berminyak blenyek-blenyek gitu. Botol ini udah bertahan beberapa bulanan, mungkin 5-6 bulan karena aku pakainya nggak tiap hari, tergantung suasana hati aja #eaaa paling enggak dua kali seminggu ada lah. Yang rutin aku pakai tiap hari itu toner, bisa sampai tiga kali sehari: bangun tidur, setelah membersihkan muka/mandi sore hari, dan yang wajib itu sebelum tidur.

Yap, sekian review dari aku. Moga bermanfaat dan ngebantu yang lagi galau pilah-pilih toner buat wajah.

Thank you for reading!

How to Sit and Shop

One week has passed ever since I came back to hometown and guess what... I miss shopping already, hehehe!!

When I was in Depok, anytime I felt like to shop for clothes, shoes and makeup I used to jump a little to Detos or MargoCity bcoz they are so close to my hostel. Even sometimes I intentionally paid a visit to Tanah Abang to hunt for blouse and dress. The perks of living in nearby capital, right?

So now bcoz I live in hometown you can conclude that spending weekend by visiting Tanah Abang or fancy malls to find nice clothes doesn't sound possible for me anymore, hiks hiks hiks....

But thank God for the internet!

I just realized that I don't have to be too sad for not being able to visit fancy malls bcoz it's time to sit infront of my laptop and go shopping at the online store! Click, click, swap, swap, done!

One online store I have recently browsed is the well-known Zalora. It sells all things that you girls love; from clothes, bags to makeups.

My latest search was for knitwear tops (you should check them now bcoz they're so cute yet affordable). Do visit Zalora once and I am sure you'll be back and shop there soon!

If I Have More Money...

Hi guys.
Alhamdulillah yesterday I reached my hometown sound and safe. I feel so happy to be at home again and hopefully I can be more productive doing my project while keeping my house clean and neat.

One surprising thing is when my Dad took me at the airport... Dad wore gemstone rings!! Not one, but two!! OMG... Dad has been infected by gemstone fever OMG... I couldn't stop laughing when seeing dad being so proud to show me his collection of  gemstone: not the luxury ones, just the affordable and beautiful colors that catched his eyes. I remembered that one day Dad commenting about how insane people nowadays being so crazy about gemstone and now here he goes, hehehe... But it's okay, I still love seeing Dad happy and has something to talk about his new hobby of gemstone.

Okay..

So I have been thinking daydreaming lately about what would I do if I got jackpot and win lots of money. What would I do...............................................................................

I think I would make a kitchen-studio and start a cooking channel on youtube. Seeing Vahchef has given me inspiration to combine things that I think I would never be bored of (cooking and acting in front of camera, hihihi).

And I really love to have a kitchen like Laura's

I subscribed to some cooking channels on youtube; Japanese, Indian, and western food as well (my subscription channel keeps growing). But till now I haven't found any Indonesian cooking channel-delivered in English-that's being so consistent in presenting Indonesian food. So guys, if you know any you can recommend me.

When I watch cable Tv at my aunty's house you can make sure that I have always tuned on cooking channel. I don't know why (maybe there's something wrong with me) but I really loooove watching foods being cooked. I even once applied to a cooking competition but till now haven't gotten any call for audition, hehehe... But it's ok. Submitting a video for the competition had been a quite challenge for me.

Hopefully step by step I can make my daydream come true. One day... Insya Allah... With a persistent hardwork and pray of course. Ameen.

Pack and Move

Hai blogger long time not posting coz tak tau harus posting apa dan mood yang fluktuatif akhir-akhir ini, kayak nilai tukar rupiah yang diagramnya meluncur ke bawah gitu...

So, last month I was in hometown and today I am in my hostel room but just for a few days left coz I am ready to..... move on.

Betul juga yang aku pelajari di bangku kuliah dulu, macam-macam live event yang bikin setres, dari yang peringkat pertama ialah setres karena ditinggalkan pasangan dan setres karena pindahan rumah menempati urutan ke... 32.

Gimana enggak setres kalo my whole life in the past 6 years must be efficiently packed into these boxes and suitcases...

Yah sebenernya sih aku hidupnya gak rempong2 bangat, I don't own any gadget in my room except laptop, mobile phone, and pocket camera. Buku2, kertas2, dll sudah pada disumbang, pecah belah juga diwariskan kepada yang masih menghuni kos2an, clothes juga (menurut ukuran pribadi) gak banyak2 amat, I am not a fan of accessories, tapi kalau sepatu sih iya mohon maap kadang masih suka sedikit khilap.

From this stressful live event I realize that how little that we actually need in life. Live your life without any extra weight, because once again, you only pick 1 when you go out. Same goes when you eat. No matter you get jackpot of a mountain of free food you can only finish 1 plate right?

Hometown & Happy New Year

I got some free time after finishing report of my field work last month so I decided to go to hometown, spending some quality time with mom and dad and enjoying my dolce far niente at home.

But...

Just reached hometown yesterday and I already miss my hostel room mhahaha...

Oh yaa, just watching SRK's latest movie Happy New Year last week and guess what...  I CANNOT STOP WATCHING IT OVER AND OVER AGAIN yaarrr!!!

It is crazy, I know... Maybe I am obsessed or maybe I am depressed, but this movie is sooo hilariously funny yaaarrrr....

Mere favorite ki song... Feels like wanna dance evry tym I listen to this 

As usual, after watching Bollywood movie, when the songs keep repeating in my head I couldn't help but start searching it on youtube and today... I found an amazing choir's group yaaarrrr..... Aareee yaarrrr.... They are soo owsm yaaarrr..... *I immediately hit like on their Facebook's page*

And also yaaarrrr... Not to forget to mention... mere ki favorite playback singer with mere ki favorite song all the time... Mr. Arijit Singh....

Side story: I got my internet quota finished in very soon

Weird Dream

Had a weird dream last night: I was trying a new foundation from Maybelline: Fit Me Foundation and it fits me very well that I recorded a tutorial on it...

I guess it's because I read a blogpost about it couple days before and I unconsciously want it inside my heart...

Have a nice day everyone!

Food For Thought

Scrolling over Diana Rikasari's blog to relax my mind and found this inspiring old post:

Thanks Kak Di :)

Greetings from East Java

Hi guys!

It's me writing here from a dormitory room in Malang, East Java.

What am I doing here? I am here for a field work in a research project from my campus.

How long would I be in here? For around 1 month.

It's my first time to work outside Jakarta/Depok and it feels like... riding a roller coaster *deep sigh*.

I don't know, but I don't feel so comfy here. I miss my room, enjoying my washroom time, my personal space and stuffs, cooking my own food, and most of all I miss my mom and my hometown as well, hiks... :''(

In the name of the heavy load of my working responsibility, wish me for a safe and smooth work here. Thanks!

Will You Marry Me?

Someone popped me that question yesterday. On the phone.

And I replied...

Umm.....
:
:
:
:
:
:
:
Ok. Yes, I will.

OMG!!!!

Just did some browsing on google picture and look who I found.....................

My sweetheart in Melayu outfit!!!!!

Dunno if it is real or photoshopped but still my sweetheart looks soo charismatic!

2015

Just get some time to blogging and I hope it's not too late to say Happy New Year 2015! May everything get better in this year and hopefully we can always be healthy and happy uhyeah!!!

Nothing much to write I guess...

I was actually planning for a beauty kind of post but I haven't taken any pict yet so I guess I will post later lah.

Life is running fine, Alhamdulillah, just getting some up and down in heart.

Well, you know, I think it's kind a time to start writing about... my love life? Really.. Err... Ok, ok..

So, I don't know where to start, but... I just met someone who has been in contact with me from the past 5 good month. Well, OMG... why I am so shy writing about it...

OK.

So, in the last Idul Fitri, my uncle introduced me to his 26 y.o brother-in-law, with the intention of YOU-KNOW-WHAT-I-MEAN.

So, we got handshake continued with a kind of super-shy meeting..

My uncle, the mastermind of this YOU-KNOW-WHAT-I-MEAN, arranged a scenario in which his brother-in-law got to have a bath in my house in kampung so that we could meet (such a weird scenario, but if you live in my kampung you will know how it is uneasy to get water to bath in some particular time).

And we did. Just a plain meet. He came to my house with an intention to have a bath without any idea that he had fallen into the scene. I knew it. I then sat in the living room, waiting. He finally came out freshly bathed and sat in the good angle where I could see him properly but I was too shy even just to see him.

It was actually not only me there, my parents and my aunty were there as well offering some sweet. The conversation was dominated by my hilarious aunty teasing him while my parents, especially my dad-just as his nature, didn't talk much. And me: mute mode on. Words exchange: no. Eye contact: sadly no!

Long story short, after that pathetic meeting he went back to his place to work and I went back home. Before I went back home, my mastermind uncle asked my mobile number and gave it to him and surprisingly, I still remember the date: 5 August 2014, he texted me a SMS and yeah...  we officially got in touch since that time. Starting by his SMS, moving on to Blackberry Messenger and then... continued by long hour of phone call haha!

There's obviously up and down during that + 4 month of communication, I once wrote here. That was quite long communication hiatus since that event, the longest period of no SMS, BBM, phone call, whatsoever. I felt so bad that time. I really wanted to call, asking how's life and hearing his voice, but again I think I was too imperious just to make a call.

Approaching the new year, he got leave from his work and he came to visit his brother in Jakarta. I knew he will visit me as well, bcoz he already told about that before that long hiatus. And yeah, he did. He managed to be soo brave to visit me at my aunty house last Saturday. That was the second time I see him in real and my first time to see him closely and intensely (well, not that close and that intense lah!). Aand.. He looks nice, well behaved somemore. I have to admit. And I feel happy to get to know that someone came to see me.

So, yeah.. That's pretty much I can write for now. I hope it (YOU-KNOW-WHAT-I-MEAN) goes toward the right path. Ameen.

Still it takes time to get to know about someone's character, right?  Hopefully it wouldn't take too long lah!

Run Run Run

Just reading an inspirational story of the world oldest marathon runner, Mr Fauja Singh.

He has been quoted as saying, "I am very careful about different foods. My diet is simple phulka, dal, green vegetables, yogurt and milk. I do not touch parathas, pakoras, rice or any other fried food. I take lots of water and tea with ginger. ... I go to bed early taking the name of my Rabba (God) as I don’t want all those negative thoughts crossing my mind."

Speaking about the marathon, he said: "The first 20 miles are not difficult. As for last six miles, I run while talking to God."

I don't know but he inspires me to keep myself healthy, always be busy with positive thoughts and keep running, moving on in life instead of being drowned in sorrow.

Have a long live baba ji!

The Lunch Box

I just bought a small lunch box last week...

The reason why I decided to buy: it comes with spoon, fork, and chopsticks, it's made of good plastic, and... it was on SALE, obviously...

But guys.. what I actually want is a lunch box exactly like this...

The reason why: becoz the inside material is made of steel so it can keep your meals warm, and... I love the color!

Yellow yellow, dirty fellow... I love YELLOW!

Just let me informed guys if you know where to get that kind of lunch box.
Thanks :)

How To: Make Your Own Eye Make Up Remover

Hi guys!

Kali ini aku mau share cara membuat sendiri make up remover yang cocok buat membersihkan make up di wajah khususnya di daerah mata. Tau kan kalo make up di bagian mata itu biasanya paling ribet dan susah buat dihapus karena areanya kecil, sensitif tapi penuh dengan aneka rupa eye shadow dan eye liner.

Menghapus make up dengan make up remover yang sudah tersedia memang lebih praktis, tapi berhubung aku jarang banget pake make up berat jadi berasa sayang aja kalo beli. Ditambah lagi make up remover suka berbau menyengat dan bikin kulit jadi kering so... why not making it myself? And here is my version of DIY Eye Make Up Remover...

Prinspnya, bahan yang diperlukan adalah kombinasi antara cairan dan minyak. Cairan di sini fungsinya adalah untuk menyegarkan kulit sementara minyak bertugas untuk melarutkan make up di wajah.

Untuk cairan aku pake toner yang ringan dan segar (jangan pake toner yang strong, karena bisa bikin perih dan iritasi) dan  untuk minyak bisa didapat dari petroleum jelly atau baby oil (bisa juga pake extra virgin olive oil atau minyak zaitun murni).

contoh hasilnya: menghapus waterproof eyeliner

Begini cara pakainya...

• Aplikasikan toner secukupnya pada kapas 
• Kemudian tambahkan satu tetes baby oil (satu tetes baby oil cukup untuk membersihkan satu bagian mata)
• Tutup matamu (ini penting nih, matanya jangan sampe melek), taruh kapas tersebut pada mata, diamkan selama 3-5 detik
• Sapukan kapas ke arah luar mata dan bersihkan sisa make up dengan usapan ringan
• Setelah make up terangkat, basuh wajah dengan face wash, bilas dengan bersih, keringkan, dan aplikasikan toner kembali jika diperlukan

Notes:

• Karena formulanya yang ringan dan alami, sisa-sisa make up yang masih nempel di wajah harus dibersihkan lagi dengan face wash dan aplikasikan toner kembali jika dirasa perlu 

Selamat mencoba and good luck!

Kyun Ki Tum Hi Ho

Cannot find words for this spectacular duet...

Kicking Out Disappointment

Let's finish all disappointment from yesterday. 

Start the new day with new idea, new plan, and new positive blog post. 

Why oh Why

Why are we so easy to judge people with zero level of knowing about each other?

People say, don't judge a book by its cover. It is true, but I know it is also not easy to stop our mind from labeling someone that passes our eyes.

For example, you were roaming in the market when you saw a very fat lady walked by. Your mind unconsciously said, what a gigantic aunty! look at her boobs. how did she find bra in that size, how will her husband.... etc, etc, etc. 

Isn't that kind of thing happen often? When we see something and our mind instantly starts thinking: this is good, this is bad, that looks so ugly, OMG she's so stupid, that's so cheap, mines better, yours worse, etc, etc.

He uses iPhone; he must be a rich-urban man. 

An aunty walks holding hands with a younger-looking man; she must be a slutty lady and he must be using her for her money.

That polkadot blouse with that ugly skirt and that dull scarf; she must be coming from a poor family with a horrible taste of fashion without any mirror in her room.

Now...

What if the fact is: he got the iPhone from stealing?

What if the fact is: they are just married, no matter that the woman is 15 years older, they find a truly comfort in each other and both are already settled down 

What if the fact is: she is a medical doctor who needs to go to the hospital immediately to save the patient so that she picks randomly what she can reach in her closet

See?

Don't easily fall in to conclusion about something that you don't have knowledge about. It is better to remain in neutral even positive vibe. Train to keep your mind away from thinking bad and most important of all, always be kind to people no matter how bad their cover look. 

==============================================================================

Ok my friend. I am feeling so sad now. And down as well.

I just came home from a scholarship interview and it didn't go very well if I may score myself. I was opt to continue my graduate study in UI so that the reviewers constantly ask, why UI? Why don't you take abroad university? Have you done any browsing for the overseas university? You don't challenge yourself? Your TOEFL score is not good enough to get to university abroad. Bla, bla, bla. What the heck is wrong with taking local university? I don't know if it's me that's never been good in pointing an argument but I don't think I delivered reasons that pleased them. Just let see how's the result in the next 2 weeks. Still I have a slight hope for the best result and definitely expect get myself ready for the worst: get rejected.

In other case, I am also sad that someone whom I've never talked in real before judged me RUDE just based on a text-chat.

He was the first that disappointed me on a phone call; I was busy talking and he surprisingly gone sleep on the other side of the phone. I instantly got upset lah! Why? Becoz already told him in advance; if you want to sleep you can go sleep and take some rest but he replied; no, no, I will sleep later.

I then continued talking and rambling before I realized that he didn't give any reply. I kept hello-ing; hello, hello, you there, you there, reply me please, you there, you sleep, where are you going, hello, hello, hello...

I then closed the phone and texted him, go to hell; 3 words that I already regret typing it right second after I pressed enter. But what can I do, the text's already sent and I couldn't delete it. 

So I guess he read it in the next morning and we didn't have any contact for the next 5 days. I keep thinking if it hurts him over and over before I decided to apologize for saying that words. He accepted my apology and asked back for apology for making me upset by leaving me on the phone like that. But then he said, are you always like that when you're upset, being rude?

What? Rude? Oh come on!

You also wrote that go to hell in your status. Now I am saying that words right in front of you thus you call me RUDE? How can you say that I am rude? Based on what? In what capacity have you been in touch with me? Have you known me very well so that you can say that I am a rude girl? Have you talked to me face to face? Have you been in difficult situation with me that wakes the evil up inside me? The answer is all NO!

I don't mean to say that I am the sweet girl that saying all sweet and wise words. No. Not at all.

When I am upset I do curse. When something went wrong I say bad words as well. But that doesn't mean that I keep saying that on the daily basis to every people. No. 

Just ask my close friends or my family (unless mom and my sister of course, hahah), none of them will ever say that I am a rude person.

It feels sad, you know. It feels sad when someone who barely knows you put a bad label on you just like that.

:'( :'(